How To Text Girls And Get A Girlfriend

Guys, are sick and tired of getting put into the "friend zone"? Well today my blog has been taken over by the talented, honest and incredibly charming Nate Adlam a.k.a The Social Sage. He's going to spell out for you with a real life example (his own!) how to text girls and get a girlfriend. Be ready to be "wowed"!

SocialSage02July2015
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Enter Nate

The hardest work was already done.

After meeting the 5’10’’, beautiful brown-eyed brunette at the local Cantina, I easily snagged her phone number, gave her a quick goodnight kiss, and was on my way.

Then, it was time for the fun to begin. Texting.

For some, figuring out how to text girls causes much stress, anguish, and confusion.

When do I text her? How much do I text her? What should I say? Why isn’t she responding?

It doesn’t always have to be this way!

When done with just a few simple ideas in mind, texting can be an amazing way to boost sexual tension and set the stage for the next time you meet. In this post, I’m going to go a bit into detail on how I used texting to attract my girlfriend.

The first text after the initial meetup happened about 15 minutes after we left each other. After receiving a “nice to meet you Nate ☺” from her, to which I responded “likewise,” and then added some kind of fun comment about her dance moves, to remind her of how much fun she had during our first meetup.

Mini Golf Anyone?

A couple days later, on a Sunday afternoon, after a quick check-in to see what she was up to on a lazy Sunday, I told her that I was playing some mini-golf with some of my college buddies in our house. We made a whole course throughout the house, and had a blast whacking the ball around. Let’s just say the walls of the house didn’t get a lot of respect this day, haha.

After telling me how much fun that sounded, she went on to tell me that she wasn’t very good at mini-golf.

It was then when I brought out my usual fun, challenging self to explain to her “oh, that’s too bad, mini golf is actually one of the more important qualities I look for in a woman. I really hope you fit the bill ;)”

#BOOM
#GAMEON

Main Take Aways

Now before I go any further, let me explain the 3 critical keys to this text that make it so effective:
1. It demonstrates that I am a fun person who knows how to flirt with a woman.

2. It demonstrates my romantic interest in her, from a position of dominance that is also fun and challenging.

3. It sets the stage for a first date.

With just this 1 simple text, I communicated to her a lot of important information that allowed her to draw conclusions about me on her own, without me directly telling her.

I subtlety demonstrated my romantic interest in her in a way that was playfully dominant, by suggesting that I have standards and qualifications for the women I date, and I don’t just go out with anyone.

Though I didn’t come right out and say that I was interested in her, she was able to recognize that I was into her by telling her that it was “too bad” that she wasn’t very good at mini-golf. As if to say, “you’re really cute, but I respect my own standards first before I agree to spend my time with you.” This may sound like an asshole-thing to think, but the fact is that woman are attracted to men that have high-standards and are not desperate.

Why This Text Was So Powerful

The other key to this text was that it set the stage for a first date. No longer did I have to think of a venue to take her to, to think about how to make conversation for an hour over dinner, or wonder how I was going to make the date interesting.

By setting it up for mini-golf, I eliminated any stress that I would have otherwise put on myself by communicating a fun date idea right then and there.

Now, let’s continue the story…

As a response to this, she said something along the lines of “yeah, that’s too bad. I hope bowling isn’t high up on the list either, or it’s not gonna work out ☺”

This was a GREAT response from her, and was the beginning of a lot of friendly, flirty competition between us.

Keeping It Warm

Fast forward about a week later, and we still hadn’t met up again. In order to prevent things from going cold, I wanted to see how her week was going.

After telling me a bit about the conference that she was at in DC for the week, she asked how the weather was over her in Ann Arbor, Michigan.

I told her, “It’s perfect mini-golf weather. A little bit of a wind out of the east to contend with, but nothing to get too worked up over. Should be a great one out on the links ;)”

Though this text may goofy or weird, I assure you it is the perfect kind of weird.

The main idea of this text is to maintain the fun, quirky, running-joke that we have going. It makes it easy to demonstrate my personality, and gives her an easy way to respond.

After concluding that mini-golf was not going to be the greatest option at that point (early April in Michigan = still snowing), we settled on an ice-cream and arcade date, to satisfy our competitive needs ☺

Why Ice Cream Dates Rock

For a quick sidebar, I highly recommend Ice cream dates are great because:

a. It gives you that feeling of already being done with dinner, so the pressure of maintaining a long dinner conversation is not there.

b. It allows you to freely change the venue as you choose, as ice cream doesn’t take long to eat, and you can always walk around with it.

c. It’s later on in the night, you can either transfer your date to getting drinks, or you can call it a night if you really aren’t feeling it.

Playground For Adults

After ice cream, we had a good time competing with each other in the arcade, over skee-ball, air hockey, and shooting games. Arcades make you feel like a kid again, and are great ways to flirt and compete with each other.

With the arcade dates, you can get her something fun and cute to remember you by. On this date, we both got matching parachute men, and a couple little rubber monsters that we gave names to and had fun with.

The key is to get something she can put on her nightstand, and think “wow, he was a lot of fun. I like him…” while she thinks of you as the last thing before she goes to bed at night.

And after that, the rest was easy. We knew at that point that we would be great for each other, and the day we finally did go mini-golfing, it was one of the most fun dates in recorded history.

Moral Of The Story

So what are the main takeaways that you can learn from my story on how to text girls?

1. The power of an inside joke
Between my girlfriend and I, the inside joke of mini-golf was incredibly powerful and was a great source of entertainment for us. It’s a great way to keep things fresh, and something to refer to when conversation gets stale.

2. The power of being fun, challenging, and dominant
The formula of fun and challenging is deadly for building massive attraction. Throw a bit of dominance and confidence in there, and you have a recipe to attract any woman.

3. Using your OWN strengths and finding your OWN style
Though dinner-and-a-movie dates seem common, they really aren’t my style. I feel more confident in my abilities to flirt and build attraction while I am doing some fun activity, when I don’t have to sit and talk for a long time. As a result, I text in a way that sets me up to take part in dates that suit my style.

I like to be on the move, so dates like ice cream, mini-golf, and arcades more suit my style. The key is to find your OWN style, and find out what your optimal environment is. In order to find out what that is, you need experience and practice.

Building Attraction Through Texting

Though the very act of texting by ITSELF did not get me a girlfriend, it made it boatloads easier for me to build attraction and have fun on the dates that I went on, and that my friends is the key in how to text girls.

Through texting, I was able to demonstrate my personality, and demonstrate how attractive I am as a man.Then, when we met in person, we were both able to lower our barriers to each other, knowing that we were flirty, fun, social beings.

What’s your best texting story? Let us know in the comments below what your secrets are for how to text girls!

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About Nathan Adlam

Nathan Adlam is the founding editor of Social Sage: An Introvert's Guide to Charm. His work has been featured on multiple sites such as Life Hack, Dumb Little Man, Single Dating Diva and Nice Guy Dating. When not lost in thought, he is an avid reader, disc golfer, athlete, self-improvement fiend, Trader Joe's enthusiast, and eternal optimist. Join him on @the_social_sage

View all posts by Nathan Adlam

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