Why Am I Single? Stop Over-Analyzing Your Text Messages!

I ran across an interesting article the other day stating that the average person has 50,000 thoughts a day. This means that you think something new once every 1.7 seconds. Wow. It went on to say that some of us have as many as 100,000 thoughts each day, which pretty much means that our mind never switches off. But there is another sneaky little thing that steals our thoughts, and prevents us from keeping a lid on them (unless we actively try). Do you know what it is?

Mindfulness
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It’s technology.

The stats are impressive:
– Over 6 billion texts are sent every day in the US alone.
– The average adult spends almost 24 hours a week texting.

…so if you’re asking yourself “why am I single?” and “why is my head is so muddled?” maybe you’re thinking way too much about the text messages you receive.

Maybe you are just over-thinking everything.

Endless – And Mindless – Thinking

But isn’t thinking great? Yes and no. The problem with thinking all the time about our text messages, and the reasons behind “why am I single” is that not all our thoughts are going to be productive.

Ever heard the phrase “you’re letting your imagination run away with you?

That’s exactly what happens when you can’t control your thoughts. A chain begins, and new links are added all the time until can’t even remember why you started a chain in the first place.

How Positive Thoughts Bring Positive Actions

Most of our thoughts – if not all – are an extension of our core mindset. If we are a positive, upbeat person, our 50,000 or so thoughts will be largely positive and upbeat.

This means that we will look at the text messages that we receive from the people we date, friends and even colleagues in a positive way.

Why Being Negative Ruins Your Texting Game & Relationship

If, however, we have a negative character, our thoughts will be downbeat and pessimistic. We will continuously ask ourselves, our neighbors and maybe even our dog “what does this #$%^ text really mean?!!!”

And even if the person sending the text meant no harm, we will inject our own negative “juice” into the message.

Negative thoughts create a never-ending chain that takes you into some very dark places, makes you unproductive and unattractive.

Places where it is almost impossible to attract and nurture a healthy relationship.

Places where you spend 24 hours per week sending negative, crappy, zero value added text messages that actually push people away from you. Voila, finally one potential answer to the question “why am I single?”.

Remember, both men and women are drawn to those with positive energy, not someone who is going to drain them dry. So, it is in your best interest to change the situation, pronto.

Mindset Is Huge, Even In Texting

To think more clearly, and to take control of your thoughts, you need to change your mindset. Guess what? Your approach to texting can be a great place to start!

Make a deal with yourself today that you will stop over-analyzing your text messages and put yourself in a resourceful state at all times.

Here are five practical tips to get you started:

1. Stop For A Second And Ask “Why?”
You are the boss here. There’s no one else around, which means there is no one else to answer to. It’s just YOU. So why aren’t you unable to gain control of your thoughts?

One of the reasons we fail to control our thoughts is because we aren’t aware of the reasons why a train of thought started in the first place. Stop thinking for a second, put your phone down, turn off the TV, computer and stove, take a deep breath and analyze what started these thoughts.

Switching a negative mindset to a positive one is far from easy, but there are ways to do it.

2. Turn The Tables
When you start thinking negatively about a situation, put a new spin on things by seeing the positives. If you’re about to send a text complaining, criticizing or lashing out, stop. Catch yourself, and find a gentler way to put things or a better angle to approach from.

You could also start thinking of solutions. Instead of dwelling on why you’re in this situation, start asking how you can get yourself out of there.

3. Be Thankful
It’s hard to be negative when you are feeling thankful about all the good things you have in your life. Make a list of everything you have to be thankful for. Save it on your phone for easy access and take a peek before you send another depressing or seriously negative message

4. Make It A Habit
Just like sports, learning languages or any other skill, you need to practice! If your new positive thoughts seem to encourage you, keep thinking them. Send some spontaneous, good vibe text messages to friends and family. It’s a great way to spread the love while staying upbeat and optimistic.

5. Meditate
Meditation is essentially the act of emptying your mind of all thoughts.

It’s powerful stuff because it frees you from complex and even simple thoughts, soothing your mind, and freshening things up so that you can see things more clearly. It also allows you to get to grips with bad thoughts, and stops them from getting out of control.

If you don’t want to meditate, you could take a nap, go for a walk, or listen to calming music.

Replace “Why Am I Single?” With Positive Thoughts

Use these tips to start taking control of your mindset, your thoughts, and even your text messages. You’ll be amazed at the difference positive thinking can make in every aspect of your life – instead of spending 24 hours per week sending negative vibe messages and agonizing over every single text you receive, you will be spreading positive energy and making yourself even more attractive. And as an added bonus you won’t be asking yourself “why am I single?” anymore, because you will be attracting guys or girls than you even know what to do with!

Want to up your flirt factor? Sign up for our FREE 30 day Texting Club!

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About Claudia Cox

Claudia Cox is a modern communication expert who gives singles and couples alike the tools they need to improve their relationships. She is the creator of The Text Weapon Texting Club, and the author of French Seduction Made Easy. She loves the outdoors, baking tasty treats for friends, and of course, texting.

View all posts by Claudia Cox

2 Responses to “Why Am I Single? Stop Over-Analyzing Your Text Messages!”

  1. hey i want to know that what text you can send a guy wich is not flirty but he feels attracted.

    • Hi Kashika,
      It’s nice to hear from you! 🙂 I don’t know anything about your relationship (if it’s your boyfriend or someone that you just met). However, everyone likes to feel special. So, I would suggest sending him a message just letting him know that you are thinking about him, or excited to see him if you have plans later in the day. For example: “Good morning! I can’t want to see you today”
      Bisous,
      Claudia

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